o The talk gives a detailed explanation of the basics of NFP. Learn about a method that is safe, inexpensive and reliable. "This talk changed my life, my faith and my relationship with God."If you are married - or engaged to be married, I do recommend finding out more about NFP. Many Catholic couples have routinely engaged in contraception and simply never heard the richness of the Catholic Church's approach to marriage and fertility. I personally know couple whose lives have been enhanced by finding out about this teaching.
o The theological and biological difference between contraception and NFP will be explained.
o The divorce rate of couples who use NFP is around 2%, compared to 40% among contraceptive users.
o Further information is given on the damage that some forms of contraception do to the body. Few realise that the oral contraceptive pill causes abortions.
Farm Street Church is in central London: 114 Mount St W1K 3AH - about 5 minutes' walk from either Green Park or Bond Street tube stations. If you are going to the talk, it's worth bearing in mind that there is a 6pm weekday Mass in the Church - which is very well worth a visit.To reserve a place: (first come, first served): email Robert Colquhoun
8 comments:
Why should those who are engaged be encouraged to practice NFP? Are we admitting that marriage is not for having children?
Fair point - but many engaged couples are already using contraception and could be encouraged by learning about NFP to think in a more pro-life way. A lot of NFP couples actually end up having lots of children by choice because NFP leads them to think differently.
I understand your pastoral position. Since I'm not a priest I have the luxury of considering matters from a more theoretical perspective, so...
If engaged couples are already practicing artificial contraception, would it be too much to ask them to stop fornicating or else go and find another church or ecclesial community to give them the big OK?
I don't mean to be rude, but aren't we being so permissive either way that the sacrament is being watered down? Wouldn't it be better to demand a higher standard from people seeking the sacrament of marriage from the Church?
Certainly a bishop wouldn't ordain a young man who maintained a sexual relationship with a girlfriend, and announced to his formation board that he didn't think his priesthood need include the offering of the Mass. (Well... perhaps in my seminary days that might have happened, but that's a different story.) It seems to smack of clericalism to expect a higher standard from those seeking ordination than from those seeking marriage.
If it's a matter of fearing to alienate those who have already alienated a faith they merely hold in name only, I say let the Church shrink in size, but grow in fervor.
Try as I might - and I have, sincerely - I can't see any difference between the pill and NFP. The goal of both is to avoid having children.
David - in the end, you need to get people into the position where their perfectly natural (created) inclinations are exercised within the law of God. So if a couple is living together without being married, my main concern is to get them to continue their relationship as married people, and to facilitate their marriage without too much fuss. But if we can also get them to learn about NFP, that is a great bonus for them.
C.L. - couples who use NFP often end up having more children; not because NFP fails but because they ask the question "Why was it we didn't want to have another child?" and realise that the answer is not so compelling. NFP involves renunciation. Contraception provides a way of avoiding any question or self-examination.
Fr. Tim, I can't help but think that is more of a surrender than a justification. I can't wrap my mind around introducing young people to the sacrament of marriage while at the same time turning a blind eye to actions that fundamentally damage the marriage vows they will enter into. Of course, I'm sure every case is different, but I at least hope that you insist they stop cohabiting for some period of time before their marriage.
At any rate, I sincerely pray that such tactics will lead people to salvation eventually.
God bless!
Not to mention the fact that many women don't like to call it NFP and prefer the term "fertility awareness" (*God* plans my family, *I* understand the gift of fertility that He has given me) -- by understanding that fertility I can protect my health and the health of my unborn children. When undergoing screening for ovarian cancer a few years ago, I astonished a sonographer by telling her *exactly* what she would see when looking at my ovaries (with regard to ovulation dating). "How did you know, are you a doctor?" she asked - "nope, just a woman who has a brain and can read" I replied ;-).
Similarly, all five of my pregnancies have been dated accurately based on knowing exactly when ovulation happened. This is useful to avoid intrusive early pregnancy "screening" which masquerades as existing to "date" the pregnancy (but often raises false positive "abnormal" results and resultant pressure for further intrusive testing).
Fertility awareness was also helpful when I lost a baby in early pregnancy -- I knew exactly how old the baby was, which helped avoid an interventionist "managed" approach (which entails risk to future pregnancies, and would have made an already heartbreaking situation even more traumatic). Once they realise that you actually do know what you're talking about, most midwives and doctors are respectful and interested.
It wouldn't occur to me to use this knowledge in a deliberately contraceptive way any more than it would occur to me to run down a pedestrian in my car. Fertility awareness is a useful tool -- whether or not it is sinful depends on what you do with the knowledge.
I learned about fertility awareness from books, and wonder whether the way it is taught might be part of the problem. There is a universe of intentionality between saying "here's a way to understand a gift from God" and "here's a sneaky form of Catholic-friendly contracecption". The latter, sadly, often appears to be the selling point for NFP which is a shame in all senses of the word.
David - not "turning a blind eye" but encouraging them to start living according to the teaching of the Church.
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